10 Questions About Money Every Couple Should Ask Before Marrying

Money is the least romantic topic in the world. It’s not something you’d like to discuss during the courtship period. But we must talk about it. Talk openly, discuss each aspect and try to understand what your partner thinks about money. Finances must be discussed in advance to have better hold of both money and relationship. The moment a relationship turns serious, practical aspects of it become more vital. Please pay attention to these questions, work on them, so you can have a fulfilling relationship:

1. What is your 5-year or 10-year financial plan?

Every individual has some aspirations. Be it career-wise or family-wise. As both these are translated and measured in terms of money, ask your partner’s plans and tell yours. When do you plan to buy a house? What are your 10-year goals? How do the both of you plan to save for the down payment for the house? How much salary you both expect to earn in the next 5 years? And, how do you both plan to work towards achieving each one of these goals? This may seem a little intimidating, but discussing your finances in detail with your partner will set a solid foundation for your relationship to grow.

2. Where do you like to spend or save money?

Our spending and saving habits are shaped by our family, background and friend circle. There is a high chance – what is basic to you is luxury for your partner. Such a difference of opinion can cause a rift later. So ask beforehand. Ask your partner – where do you like to save or splurge? Whether he likes can occasional date at a 5-star? Or he only dines at a 5-star? Ask, if she saves first from her paycheck? Or she saves the remainder at the end of the month? The idea is to know how well you will complement each other to run a household together.

3. Do you have any loan?

Some of us have an education loan. Some have invested in a starter home and have a home loan? Some may have a family liability and have taken a personal loan for it? Ask your partner about his liabilities. Have an open discussion. Gently inquire, how does he pay or plan to pay it off? In case you are planning to upgrade your car, renovate the home, or take a vacation immediately after your marriage, this would give a clearer picture. Understanding the finer details of each other’s finances will lessen the differences in the future.

4. What are your standing expenses, and how much it would rise after marriage?

Put all the cards on the table. Tell your standing monthly expenses to your partner and ask theirs. Calculate the combined expenses for both of you after marriage. Remember after marriage there would be some additional expenses. Then check if you both can meet those expenses in your combined salary. Plan every aspect of it. Who would pay the rent? Who will take care of the grocery bill, internet bill or cable bill? Who will take care of the loan EMIs? These questions are imperative if you want to run the household smoothly. In case you plan to live in a joint family, discuss these aspects in a different light. But discuss.

5. How much does each of you contribute to the family expenses?

We live in the times of working couples. But there are some who want to take a break to raise a family. So are you one of those couples who would take a break from work? If yes, would one salary be enough? In case you are not working before marriage, does your partner expect you to earn in the future? Who will take a sabbatical to raise children? Would you leave your job if your spouse is transferred overseas? Talk about all the situations so both of you can plan and thrive in your careers.  

6. Who will be in charge of maintaining finances, paying bills and taking investment decisions?

Never forget to ask the basic questions. The day-to-day tasks and major events must be discussed in advance. Who will pay the bills? Who will be in charge of paying insurance premiums? Will investments be a joint decision? Don’t leave these questions for the future. Many couples fall out because of money. Clearing any doubt before entering a relationship is always good. It provides a sense of security. And equal participation ensures a healthy relation.

7. Do you have any savings or investments to begin a new life together?

Young couples always have more dreams than money. Most are either paying student loan or on the verge of taking a home or car loan. Ask your partner if he has any savings to start your new life. This will help with the down payment. Talk about investment, too. It will help with long-term future planning.

8. What are your plans for children and retirement?

People talk about children before marriage. It’s an obvious and romantic topic. But we don’t discuss the practical aspect of it. In addition to how many kids you want? Ask, how would you save for their education? See, if your partner thinks about such questions rationally. Talk about retirement, too. What age do you want to retire? How much savings and investment you wish to have to take an early retirement? Has either of you invested in a retirement or pension policy?

9. Would you support your family if need be? Do you have a plan for that?

Family, friends and relatives often become a bone of contention in marriage, especially if money is involved. Couples who are clear on this topic from the beginning have fewer worries later. Start by asking – does your partner support his family now? If not, would your spouse be okay if you have to support your family in the future? And how would the both of you do that? Be sensitive while discussing this topic. Remember, we marry into a family.

10. Do you inherit any money and what do you plan to do with it?

Most of us inherit a house or money from our parents. There are no qualms about discussing it with your partner. Have an open discussion and tell them what you intend to do with that money? If your partner is inheriting a house, ask what does he plan to do with it? Does he want to keep it for child’s education or marriage? If they are not okay discussing it right now, accept that too.

The idea is to discuss every aspect of money. Don’t leave it for the future. If you can’t discuss it now, it won’t be easy in the future. Talk now and sort out any difference you may have.

What specifically did you discuss with your partner before marriage? Do you have more questions which couples should discuss before marriage? Please share in the comments below.